Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Baywatch





Okay, so like Lisette’s dad drove Lisette and me and Courtney to see “Baywatch.”


I could totally tell he was like checking me out in the rearview mirror, he’s such a perv. But he’s kind of a DILF so it’s like okay. Anyway, omigod you guys, like, Zac Efron is sooo cute in this. He like totally made me wet. He like wears these like really tight red like lifeguard shorts and stuff. And he has to do this like obstacle course to like join the Baywatch team and he takes his shirt off and it’s like pecs ahoy! Then The Rock is like, no, that’s not the real course, now you have to do it all over again, and I was like kinda sad, but kinda not, y’know? And when he’s not like shirtless and Jet-skiing in those tight shorts he’s like surfing around in this like skin-tight gray neoprene wetsuit that like really clings to him and stuff. And to get back at him for staring at her tits this one girl like stares at his package and she goes like, “Now we’re even.” And The Rock is always calling him like “N’Sync” and “Bieber” and stuff, but then one time he calls him “High School Musical.” But he was like really in that – duh. And there's this like fat Jewish guy whose like dream is to join Baywatch, and they like feel bad for him so they like make him a trainee. And he has to like distract the bad girl, so he does this like horrible dance for her and then after they're like, dude, where did you learn to dance like that? And he's like, "Hebrew school."  So yeah, it’s just like really funny and sexy and stuff.

No comments:

Post a Comment