You'll search in vain for a laugh, a chuckle, even a smile in the DOA franchise-ender "Scary Movie V." Forget about a rental; this is the sort of movie you'd switch off on free TV. Were it a horse, they'd shoot it. You can smell the desperation with each insipid pop-culture reference, scatological joke, Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan cameo. Last one out, turn off the lights
